Feeling What You Feel

Yesterday afternoon was a little tough. Allowing myself to feel it was good for me though. It allows me to get up this morning to a new day. That's a big part of my journey. By letting myself feel the sad, I let it out. It's not stuck inside weighing heavy on my heart. I was able to go to bed and sleep well and get up this morning to a new day. I've had times when I didn't let go and the sad would linger for days on end. I've been told by many sources to "feel what you feel when you feel it." This means not only the sadness but feel happy as well. After a sad afternoon, I got to go to Steven's Court of Honor for scouts. He was ending his term as SPL - Senior patrol leader. I was able to feel great pride and happiness for him as he stood in front of scouts and parents and ran the meeting. One quote that I go back to from my GriefShare group is this:

"And the people who recover are the people who admit their pain and are able to talk about it and share it." - H. Norman Wright

So I acknowledge my pain. Sometimes it's just too much. I do miss Kristen. Not having her here is like missing a part of myself. Sometimes I think that her personality was often a reflection of a part of me that I couldn't let out. I think that now I'm trying to figure out how to incorporate some of those back into the more reserved me.

Anyway, without rain, how can we appreciate the sun?